Wednesday, March 11, 2020
Real Talk How Soon Is Too Soon to Combine Finances With Your Partner
Real Talk How Soon Is Too Soon to Combine Finances With Yur Partner Merging finances is an important but big move to make for many couples.Tzu siche are many reasons to combine incomes couples with joint accounts may find it easier to keep track of their finances, as theyre likely spending on rent, groceries and other shared expenses together. Likewise, a higher sum of money will grow faster in a savings account, so couples can earn more over time.But merging finances is a serious step in a relationship. After all, youre putting trust in one another to spend and save responsibly and, in some cases, youre agreeing to share your hard-earned income in order to achieve a life you want to live together. So how do you know when the best time to take this step is?Of course, theres no right or wrong answer, as this step in a relationship is largely situational. But FGBers have been chiming in on their thoughts on the matter on our community board since Kelsey S. asks How soon is too soon to combine finances with your partner?She goes onMy boyfriend and I have been living together for about three years and we are getting to the point where we split pretty much everything evenly. He brought up the option of combining our finances completely, but Im not sure if this is a smart move before marriage?Heres what FGBers have to say.1. Do it when it feels right.My, now husband, and I had the conversation about money when we were living together as we also split the bills, says Rialiama. Not everyone wants to get married, so they just combine them when they are fully committed partners. I think you have to do it when you feel comfortable. Some people, even with marriage, are not combined. It is just what is best for you two.2. Consider opening a joint account, but keeping your leistungspunkt cards and a bank account separate.One piece of advice Keep your own credit cards and bank account, advises Nancie Shuman. Have a joint account where each of you transfers a set amount of mon ey every month, and have it on auto bill pay so that no one has direct access on a regular basis. Reconcile the hell out of it every month, and make a date every quarter to go over what is working and what isnt, and any adjustments which need to be made, both in contribution and in output. Also, be very clear what is and isnt the household responsibility as opposed to personal. Some things get fuzzy fast.Others agree.Weve been married 12 years and we still keep separate accounts, says an anonymous FGBer. We have one joint account for joint expenses. Both of us went through divorces, so both of us know better than to combine finances. Just dont do it.Keeping personal accounts personal seems to be a common theme.We have our own personal checking and savings, but we also have a joint account to which we contribute monthly in equal amounts, where all the house bills come out off and where we save for such things as vacations and family outings, says Alejandra Merz. I like that we have s eparate so that when I buy them a gift, its from my money. Hope that helps some.3. Keep the communication open.Money is a tough issue for some people, so I think a lot of conversations should be had about it and honestly, make them fun, adds an anonymous FGBer. Hubby and I have money dates because thats the only way I can talk about finances without panicking. We have a shared checking and shared savings account. We use Simple banking so we can set goals (long- and short-term), and then whatever money we have leftover we keep in our personal accounts for whatever it is, like our hobbies, etc. Communication is key. As long as you have that, youll be okay4. Understand the legal side.Why would you combine finances without being married? I do not see any advantage to you in doing this, unless you have a written agreement relating to the staffelung of expenses and the division of assets should you separate, says A.N. In addition, depending on the law in your state, long-term cohabitatio n could allow a partner to claim common law marriage. Combining finances would only strengthen such a claim. As this suggests, I would not combine finances before marriage without a written agreement. I dont see the upside to you.5. Just stick with splitting the bills.Keep splitting the bills, says lorikimball26. Keep your own account and there wont be any disagreements in the future.Others agree, though they add that you dont necessarily need to split everything rather, you can just cover each other.My boyfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years and we just cover each others expenses, says Liz Bui. I will pay for one thing, then he does the next. We dont actually split anything anymore. I would say hold off on putting your finances together until you are legally married to him, just for your own financial safety.--AnnaMarie Houlis is a feminist, a freelance journalist and an adventure aficionado with an affinity for impulsive solo travel. She spends her days writing about wome ns empowerment from around the world. You can follow her work on her blog, HerReport.org, and follow her journeys on Instagram her_report,Twitterherreport and Facebook.
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